I started this post back in August, feeding it some love around the time of the Fall Equinox, and finishing it on Halloween. My mind was telling me to hurry up and finish, but now looking back I can see the symbolism and how my experiences brought me to this point. So I will start with today and move backwards.
Halloween comes during a time where we are moving towards the cold and dark of winter. And sometimes it is hard to see the beauty of life when leaves are falling, darkness is lurking and death is showing it's face as the seasons turn. But for some reason, Fall has always stood to be my favorite time of the year. Maybe it's because my birthday is in September, or maybe it's because I love the smell of wet earth mixed with dead leaves, but something in me feels at home with the melancholy offerings of Fall. I have always seen death as the chance for rebirth. The slowing of space and time, allowing for us all to go inward, recharge, and generate new strength for the impending change of season. This is death. Not an ending, but a new beginning of something often unknown. Death and regeneration are linked in Goddess theology. Birth, growth, death and renewal are a cycle that plays over and over again through natural systems and human lives. Embracing this cycle, we don’t need to fear death, but instead can see it as a stage of life and a passage to some new form of being.
Now, I have totally said it before, but I am in awe of the berries here in the PNW. The abundance that's literally growing on the side of the highway makes those of us who aren't originally from here giddy with sweet delight. But in truth, I am feeling grateful for ALL the abundance that mother nature, the goddess that she is, provides and surrounds us with. The hundreds of apples falling off my parents trees. Picking them by the box full and to eat and press and bake and preserve. The tomatoes grown by our neighbors to can for the winter. Our pantry is filled with jars of nettle tea from this past years harvest. Bags of strawberries in our freezer from our neighbors garden because she grew too many!? I walk outside to find herbs and roots and seeds that heal, nurture and fortify my family and our community.
The list of abundance goes on and on, leaving me in awe, but also asking why we don't always feel this awe? Our natural state is that of total abundance. Meaning, we are whole and lacking nothing, and everything we have ever wanted or needed is already right in front of us. Even as death surrounds us, often leaving us frozen in fear, our true nature exists within us.
This season of death asks us all to shed the pieces of ourselves that do not serve humanity or our highest selves. Asking us to look deep and see the darkness that lives within us. Once we see it and accept that it lives within us, sit with it and let it all die. Ultimately this death of ourselves allows space for transformation, bringing us back to wholeness. Back to a state of total abundance and remembering that death is no barrier to love, and every ending brings a new beginning.
“It’s time to step into personal as well as our collective Darkness with courage and a willingness to ‘take Death as your adviser’ as don Juan advised Carlos Castaneda.